Let he who is without sin cast the first stone!

There is a biblical story that goes like this.  When an adulteress was brought to the village square and was about to be meted out the traditional punishment of death by stoning, all the villagers gathered and took up a stone each. When the family of the woman appealed to Jesus who was in the village, he apparently said words to the effect that: “This woman must be punished. But Let he who is without sin cast the first stone”.

I am reminded of this story when I read all the posts in various whatsapp groups about recent cases wherein famous Politicians and Actors in India are able to hire top-notch lawyers or pay their way out of tough criminal cases and avoid going to jail. The common refrain is that the law should be applicable to everyone and just because someone has money-power he/she should not be spared. I wonder how many of us have always strictly adhered to various laws?

We need to do some soul searching and ask ourselves how many times we have paid a bribe – to the traffic cop after jumping a red light; to the TTE for a berth when there were others ahead of us in the waitlist; to the government clerk or ‘karmchaari’ for speeding up our case; to the IT officer to be lenient etc. etc.

My point is about the principle not the magnitude of the crime or the amount of the bribe.  If we value our work to be done and don’t mind paying a 1000 Rupees to escape the law we too will probably pay up.  If our child was involved – even unwittingly- in a crime, would we actually tell the cops, “he is a criminal, take him and punish him/her to the full extent of the law”? No. My bet is that our first thought will be to spend whatever it takes to ensure our child goes scot free.   We will probably consider a few thousand bucks well spent if our kid can avoid a night in jail.  In Sallu’s case a few lakhs/crores is the same as a few thousand bucks is to us. The amount is relative. What is not relative and common is that we all are willing to pay something and escape facing the law.

I am sharing this thought for us to reflect and self-introspect.

Canada's Health Care System: A personal story

Feeling confident (though still slightly apprehensive) before surgery for a total thyroidectomy on Monday Jan 26. This post is not about the 'why' and 'what for?' about my surgery. This is aimed at being a feel good story about the care and human elements in the health care delivery process in Canada!

Two months ago when the biopsy results came in, the surgeon’s office called me. The surgeon spent a good 30-minutes explaining to me the results, what they meant, the likely paths (with probabilities) that the cysts on my thyroid might take and my treatment options. This was indeed an illustrative talk with him drawing out the diagrams on his iPad! Given the odds and the prognosis I took his advice to go for a total thyroidectomy in one go, and was lucky to get a date within two months. (Alberta’s, like most of Canada, public health system is totally free for residents but is notorious for longish wait times for elective non-life threatening conditions!). 

A week before the surgery, I was pleasantly surprised to receive a call from the hospital (https://www.covenanthealth.ca/…/misericordia-community-hosp…) inviting me to attend a pre-surgical assessment clinic. During the more than 2 hour session I was seen by three different nurses and an anaesthetist, to assess my readiness, offer counselling and answer any questions that I may have. I was ushered into a regular examination room offered a seat at the table and a glass of water/coffee etc. After the routine physical check-up the 2nd nurse took an ECG and then the third nurse walked me through the entire process right from preparation at home and diet restrictions from the night before surgery, through to what the admission process will look like, time expected in the operating room followed by time in the recovery room, before I would be taken back to my room for an overnight stay. She concluded with the discharge and post-operative care that will normally be required. She told me that precise instructions for my condition would be given at time of discharge. This was not just her talking and my taking notes furiously. She told me to put away my note-pad and instead wrote the pertinent details in a pre-printed prepared booklet for me to carry back and not worry about missing some detail. By the end of her talk, my expectations were set and most of my routine questions – e.g.: what to wear, what to (and not to) eat and what to do with my glasses etc., were taken care of. Despite all the details that she provided, she assured me that on the day of surgery, the surgeon himself will be ready and willing to answer any further questions that I may have. The one thing that stuck with me long after the meeting was her mentioning not to get worried when I hear the surgical team talking at the time of surgery and asking me or each other what might look like routine questions. She assured me that this was because they are required to follow the WHO recommended ‘Safe Surgery Check List’ to ensure the best and safest possible outcome from the surgery. Part of this is to encourage me – and members of my family - to ask as many questions as I have and to keep talking to the surgical team. The time in the operating room is estimated at 1-hr & 40 minutes.

I was next seen by the Anaesthetist who put me completely at ease explaining how the General Anaesthesia will be administered, how the attending anaesthetist will be constantly monitoring me and how they will slowly revive me from deep slumber and ensure my condition is stable before moving me to the recovery room where another set of nurses will take over. She told me that I will probably need to be in the recovery room for an estimated 1-hour after which I will be moved to my room where I will be under observation overnight before being discharged the next day. The pre-assessment clinic then ended with a visit to the pathology lab within the hospital itself for getting a detailed blood analysis report. (More paper for my already thick binder!).
Sharing the story in some detail, as it made me realize the true meaning of what being a resident of a first world country meant. The medical profession at all levels is totally committed not just to treating me (admit – do procedure- discharge) but treating me like a human being all through the process, recognizing that (my family and) I would have emotional worries and taking the pains to address our concerns. And all this for an ordinary person. I am no VIP!

I recognize that while free at a transactional level, this is truly my tax dollars at work. But I would gladly pay any amount of tax so long as I have the assurance that those tax dollars will work for me, if and when I, or my family, need it. 

Blessed to be living (and paying taxes) in Canada!

Why do family and friends interfere in our marriages in India

The question of why friends and family interfere so much in our marriages, in the Indian context, has been vexing me for some time.  

And I believe, I've finally cracked it!

The answer is simple.  It is because we invite them into our marriages. Let me explain.

Take a random Indian wedding invitation. Yes I am talking about both the printed variety as well as the ones that are nowadays ubiquitous on social media (mainly Facebook & Twitter).  Up front and centre the invitation reads:

“Smt. and Shri (or the more modern Mrs. and Mr) So and So, Cordially invite you with family and friends…… “

- Ahaa!  The first mistake!  You might as well invite the whole town. We are all one big family and where the bloodline breaks, we have so many friends! Of the social media (Facebook) variety!

But the problem does not stop there! The next words are in my opinion the root cause of the whole problem.  Continuing with our example:

 “Smt. and Shri (or the more modern Mrs. and Mr) So and So, Cordially invite you with family and friends to the marriage of their daughter (or son)  XYZ  with ABC  etc etc…… “ .

Note that I have highlighted the word ‘marriage’. Now that means the whole period from the time the young couple tie the knot till ‘Death doth do them apart’!  That’s what is commonly meant by the term marriage. e.g., “my marriage is successful”, “She is in her third marriage”, or that famous line from Princess Diana, “I often felt there were three of us in this marriage”.  So if you invite someone (and worse still with their family and friends) to the “marriage”, you have invited them for a long, long time.

Now I don’t believe in just diagnosing the problem and not giving a remedy. The first simple remedy is to put the names of the persons you are inviting on the top of the invite and cut out the ‘with family and friends’ part.

But this is not so effective until you follow the second corrective step. Replace the word ‘marriage’ with  ‘wedding’ or ‘wedding ceremony’. This way you are sure that you are inviting certain specified individuals (& not their whole brood consisting of extended family & friends) to a certain specified ceremony/function called– yes you guessed it – the ‘wedding’. This is the brief 2-3 hours that it takes for the bride and the groom to exchange vows, accept the gifts from invitees and for all to enjoy the good food, music and dance and then depart.

So if you want peace and quiet from interfering friends and relatives in any marriage, amend your invitation to read:  

“Smt. and Shri (or the more modern Mrs. and Mr) So and So, cordially invite you to the wedding ceremony of their daughter (or son)  XYZ  with ABC  etc etc…… “.

Problem solved!

Now, Earn that Bharat Ratna, Sachin!

Dear Sachin,

There has been considerable hoopla about your retirement from test cricket. Your fans and the media have been involved in a keen tussle to out-awe each other with their praises for you, their wailing about what will happen to Indian Cricket and all the talk about this being the end of an era!

I do not share any of their angst – after all an era is longer than 24 years! Nor do I share Shashi Tharoor’s worries about how India will cope without you wielding the willow in Test Cricket. I think India has bigger problems than your retirement.  There’s the poverty, the hunger, the illiteracy not to speak of the communal hatred being spread by self seeking politicians. But that should not bother you!

What should bother you is: “What now?”If I were you, I would sit down in front of a mirror and look myself in the eye and ask myself, what it means to be the nation’s 43^rd Bharat Ratna. Who are the other 42? What is/was their claim to fame?  For the most part they were either Freedom activists or self- seeking politicians (people who you co-awardee Dr Rao referred to as ‘idiots’)! There are of course some who excelled in the fields of Music/ Entertainment, the Sciences, Educationists, and even a couple of non-citizens (Khan Abdul Ghaffar Khan and Nelson Mandela).  I would then wonder, what it is that made the powers that be think that I deserved this award. Is it just a political stunt on the part of the ruling party to cash in on my popularity and keep my myriad fans happy just when the elections are around the corner? Or is there finally recognition of the image building value that 'Brand Sachin Tendulkar' brings to India? Whatever, the reasoning, I would probably conclude that it is what it is; I might as well bask in the glory. This could probably explain your magnanimous gesture in dedicating your award to all mothers in India. What does this ‘dedicating’ mean?  Will it mean that you will take up the causes of mothers, instead of the inane ad promotions for various material goods that you get paid so fabulously for?  Or maybe you will use some of the wealth that fame has bestowed you with, to set up hospitals in remote locations with only one mission:  “No more mothers dying during child-birth!” Or maybe it is just a cliché and I am digressing in delusion!

Anyway, back to the “What now?” question. How can you silence all those critics who think that awarding you the Bharat Ratna was misplaced?  Here are just a couple of humble suggestions to actually ‘earn’ that Bharat Ratna: 

1. You could set up a 'Sachin Tendulkar Foundation' that will spot talent and train deserving children in every Olympic sport, setting your administrators and coaches the goal of 20 Gold Medals in the 2020 (Tokyo). That is 7-years from now! And Tokyo has just started building the facilities. So if they can plan and deliver the Olympics in 7-years, I guess  you can plan and get to the target of producing seven Gold medal winning athletes. Money should not be a problem for you. And judging by the harsh life that most children in rural India live neither should physical grit, endurance and will-power.  What is needed is good coaching, motivation, proper equipment and the right nutrition! This way you can be the catalyst for spawning many more Bharat Ratnas from the field of sports!  When you are 70, would you prefer to be known for all your cricketing records (some of which might be bettered by then) or would you want to be known for your service to Indian sport in all its shapes and forms. 
2. You could use Brand Sachin for promoting India as a tourism destination.  God knows we have more natural beauty that any other place in the world. And we need that foreign exchange to save the Rupee.

 So go for it Sachin.  You described your cricketing life as between 24 years and 22 yards.  But come on, Sachin! Life is more than years and yards.  It is also about how many lives one has tangibly touched and improved.

Eagerly looking forward to your second innings,

Sincerely,

Jammi

Seven reasons to love living in Canada,

Seven reasons to love living in Canada, based on a just released OECD report:

·         Income: The average household earns US$28,194 each year after taxes. That’s more than US$5,000 above the OECD average. There is disparity at both ends of the earnings spectrum though, not surprisingly. The top 20% takes home US$55,718, while the bottom 20% earns US$10,526. We ranked seventh on household wealth and ninth on income.

·         Community: Canadians spend two minutes a day volunteering; that’s about half the OECD average. On the other hand, 64% said they’d helped a stranger in the last month. (The OECD average is 48%.) And 94% know someone they could count on if needed. We ranked seventh on support network.

·         Housing: Nine in 10 Canadians are satisfied with their housing. The average home in this country provides 2.6 rooms per occupant, more than any other country. And 99.8% of Canadians live in a home with a private washroom that has an indoor, flushing toilet. (The OECD average is 97.8%.) We ranked 24^th on the ratio of housing costs to income, eighth on basic facilities and first on number of rooms per person.

·         Environment: We’re better than average on both air pollution and water quality measures. We ranked 14^th on pollution and 12^th on water quality.

·         Health: Our life expectancy at birth is 81, a full year above the OECD average. And 88% of Canadians say they are in good health. Health spending in this country makes up 11.4% of gross domestic product. (The OECD average is 9.5% of gross domestic product.) We ranked third in health and 17^th in life expectancy.

·         Safety: Just 1.3% of Canadians said they were assaulted over the one-year period leading up to the survey. That’s well below the OECD average of 4%. Our homicide rate is less impressive. It’s 1.6%, only marginally below the average rate of 2.2%. We ranked first on assault rate and 23^rd on homicide rate.

·         Work-life balance: Canadians work an average 1,702 hours per year. That’s 74 hours below the OECD average. When asked if they work more than 50 hours a week, 4% said yes. (The OECD average is 9%.) We ranked ninth on working long hours.

The US FED just gave the junkies more Opium!

Imagine your son or favorite nephew (or any one you love a lot and are in charge of caring for) is hooked on drugs! Doctors have told you that if he continues with this habit, his end is near. There are two ways to cure him of his addiction. One is by taking away his stash of drugs -which will in the short run aggravate his condition and make him more violent and increase your task of caring for him. You may have to probably give up your day job to care for him. A painful process for both. The other way is to say, ”YOLO -You only live once!” and let him continue on his drug habit- in fact supplying him more, to ensure that he is apparently happy, while you can go about your daily business! What would you do?

Now, replace the addict with the “Markets” and yourself with the “US Federal Reserve”. Yesterday the FED decided to keep the taps flowing. What’s flowing out of the tap was once antibiotics for the market (QE). It has now become pure opium! And the markets are cheering that the taps will continue to flow! Come on you faceless Market! The US Fed just said that they are not sure of growth prospects for the world’s largest economy. In fact they trimmed the growth forecast. So what the hell are you cheering about?   

Another Gang Rape!

One more gang-rape – this time in Mumbai! It once again brought back memories of the horrific Delhi incident of December last year! The whole country – physically and in the social media- is going atwitter with laments of the state of affairs and calls for stricter punishment, some going to extremes to say we should introduce ‘Shariaa’ laws in India! But, stepping back from the immediacy of this case, it seems strange to me that all this outpouring of disgust and revulsion seems to be reserved for cases emanating from India’s Metros, where the victim is an educated and or upwardly mobile, hard working young woman. While deplorable, these are only two cases out of hundreds in the past 8-months. There have been umpteen cases, before and after the Delhi case. And these are happening all over the country. The people who are taking to the streets and the social media clearly identify with these victims as one of their own. And it is admirable that the spotlight that is cast on these cases, is causing the law enforcement agencies to up their act and be seen to be taking action. But what about those hundreds of rapes and gang-rapes – some where the victims are as young as 4-yrs old? Who is shedding a tear for them or pushing the administration to bring the culprits to justice?

That apart, are stricter laws (death penalty or ‘castration’ as the reference to Shariaa law seems to suggest) the solution? What about the efficacy with which the law enforcement machinery is able to bring a case to court, try the accused and prove them guilty beyond reasonable doubt and mete out the appropriate punishment? What eventually is a good deterrent? A strict law or stricter enforcement? We have the death penalty for murder –in extreme, ‘rarest of the rare’ cases! But has that meant that we have no murders? What is the conviction rate? What is the speed with which successful convictions happen? It’s been 8-months since the Delhi gang-rape. And the case is being tried in a ‘Fast Track court’. Under what definition is ‘8-months and counting’ Fast? Why is about 40% of the police force engaged in protecting VIPs? What if India were to have a full blown economic crisis like the one in Punjab, where the State Government is apparently unable to pay salaries of policemen among other government employees? These are disturbing questions for which I don’t have the answers.

I noticed that some of the comments on Facebook and other social media ask the question: “What makes men turn into such devils?” or “our culture is all about respect for women- they are symbolized by our mother or sisters Why then do some men treat women with such contempt and violate their inner persona”. These are definitely good questions for psychologists to attempt to answer. But I have a theory and it has to do with the way societal morals have changed over time. Our cinema, like all of show biz, now promotes promiscuity like never before! Senseless Item numbers like ‘Sheela Ki Jawaani” and “Munni Badnaam Hui” only glamorize the vamp. Most of us watch such movies for three hours, get back to our lives and think nothing more about it. But there must be a lumpen element out there who possibly are not able to distinguish between the make-believe world of cinema and the real world. These are the people who actually believe that Shah Rukh Khan / Rajnikant can single-handedly smash 20 sword wielding guys to pulp! For these people such item numbers only help to reinforce years of cultural power stereo type of male supremacy and convey the message:  “It is okay to look upon women as objects!”  From there it is a downhill slope – beginning with staring at women, passing lewd comments, grabbing various parts of the anatomy of women in crowded places and in some cases, rape.  I am not saying that cinema is the main factor in the ‘objectification’ of women. I use it as an example for one of the players along with other elements like the fashion world, the ad-world ( the way products for ‘fair skin’ are pushed) and also factors like illiteracy and unemployment.

Any comments are welcome.